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Public Fears in Privet Places

So cold is the wind that blows your hair.
So warm is your touch upon my skin.
How tired am I of being scared,
But how awake am I now that I know you’re here.

'Cause I'd rather fight with you than laugh with another.
I’d rather freeze in your arms than be warm under covers.
I’d let you hit me before I ever let you hit the floor.

And I’d rather choke than to breath in your absence.
I’d rather feel your wrath than feel another’s passion.
I’d rather die on the day that I give you a kiss
Than spend the rest of my life knowing I never did

So just hold me and tell me that I’m everything you need.
Tell me that, that lonely little heart of yours that I’ve been dying for,
Ain’t out of reach.
So if you’re looking for some proof that there’s a heart inside of me
Than lace your fingers between mine and you will see it start to leak.
And I know you’re not a crutch but I can hold you when I stand
‘Cause I am living for your touch but I would die to be your man.

Let me look into your eyes like I am searching for your soul.
Wrap my arms around your waist like it is dying from the cold.
Run my fingers through your hair like they are water from the drain.
Press my lips against your back like they could take away its pain.
To give you everything, there is nothing I won’t do.
Dump my heart into a blender just to pour it out to you.
And I know you’re feeling tired. Just let me hold you for a bit.
Dive my face between your thighs until I cannot feel my lips.

I know that you think I’m kind of odd.
But if your love was a mountain, I swear that I’d climb to the top.
I’d tell you “you’re lovely and everything I’ll ever need,
And I’d give you my all if you’d just come and stand next to me.”

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Treat her like you’re still trying to win her, and that’s how you’ll never lose her.

— (via fuckinq)

The problem with new relationships is that people believe in the “honeymoon stage”, and that when you get comfortable the passion, romance, and excitement is all gone… Every day is a new way to show the person you love just that- you love them… It’s not about what you can buy, or create, or simulate- but simply about making your significant other feel special (always and forever). Because when it comes down to it, you’re with that person because they made you feel some type of way, so what not make them feel it every day?

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07.26.14 214815
Island of the misfit boy

I love to sleep, cause I pretend that I’m dead
But I hate waking up cause it’s hard to forget
That I’ve lost all control of this life that I’ve held so dear.
And I wait for the bus but I’m not on the bench,
I’m just spread across the ground making friends with cement,
Hoping that the bus won’t miss me when it comes my way.

Well I made a few jokes but they said they weren’t funny.
I tried to force a smile but they said it was ugly.
I tried to make a friend but no one was a friend to me.
Poured my heart to a girl and it went on the floor,
And I asked her what she wanted and she said she wanted more.
I tried to find a lover, all I found was an enemy.

Well I stand in front of the mirror and look at myself.
And I don’t make a sound but my eyes scream out help
And I start to struggle to hold myself back,
From thrusting my head straight through the fucking glass
And I’m tired of falling for girls that don’t care,
And breaking my back to try to make them aware
That I’m more than depressed and their time won’t be wasted
But I am just a broken boy that no one wants to play with.

Now I’m lost in this hole and I’m sure I am stuck
And I can’t run away ‘cause I’m lazy as fuck.
So I sit on the floor as I gather my thoughts
And they’re full of broken promises that only piss me off.
Well I lost control when I was only a boy,
The world taught me angst when I deserved joy.
Now I’m breaking down as I struggle to breathe,
Cause I believe in a god who won’t believe in me.

Well I stand in front of the mirror and look at myself.
And I don’t make a sound but my eyes scream out help
And I start to struggle to hold myself back,
From thrusting my head straight through the fucking glass
And I’m tired of falling for girls that don’t care,
And breaking my back to try to make them aware
That I’m more than depressed and their time won’t be wasted
But I am just a broken boy that no one wants to play with.

07.16.14 1

misstatianac:

“you will always be worth more than what you think.” I am good. I love so fiercely. I am worth someone who gives a shit. Someone who will treasure me and let me give them everything I can in return.

07.16.14 7
Bombshell

I’ve got nothing to say
I’m still recovering
From the bombshell you threw my way
I’m left with rubble
This shrapnel in my bubble
Seems to make it just a little harder to breath

Maybe I was fooling myself when I thought this could last
Things that are left behind
Always end up in the past
Maybe I was dreaming thinking this would never end
Nothing could ever save me from losing another friend

Life seems so tricky
But beggars can’t be picky
When did this become my choice at all
My memory is failing
But you’re still on my mind daily
It doesn’t fail fast enough for me

I know this is bad timing
And words sound worse when they’re rhyming
But these are things I needed you to know
Now with all this right in front of me
(Oh, how I always loved your company)
When will this despondency fade

I’ll never know

07.09.14 1
These days.

Iv been both the man who has treated girls like total shit, and not given a fuck, and iv been the man that has watched a girl get treated like shit, and ask myself “why?” Because I think she deserves so much better!…

Iv been both the guy who has had amazing girls treat me like a king, and i I didn’t give a fuck about them, and iv been the guy that has worshiped a girl and she treated me like total shit…

I guess what I’m trying to say is…. I understand…

That’s a lie! I’ll never fucking understand. But as a human the concept of the idea that I might try to
understand (just for a moment) how “love” works- it makes relationships just a little bit easier. Theoretically…

This might make sense- I have loved so deeply and pure, that now I hate so very much more deeply and pure…

They say you can’t love someone until you love yourself. That’s bullshit.
Because dear god, I fuxking hate myself- but iv loved so hard…

I started this post at 6am in the morning after a 2hr “nap”.

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